I haven’t spoken much on this blog about my sisters. I’m 15 posts short of 1,000 on this blog my oldest little sister is mentioned in 12 posts. My favorite post about her was written in 2009 ahead of her January visit to San Francisco. At the time, I had been in SF for 3 years and she was about to enter high school as a freshman.
In two weeks, she is graduating high school at the old age of 17. She’ll probably tell you she’s almost 18 because she will be on July 1st. Even though she’s almost an adult, she’s still a baby but the photos Mom sent over tell a different story. One of my sisters is all grown up and that’s something that’s pretty unbelievable but is a natural part of life.Her senior Prom was 3 days ago and she did look beautiful but, as her older brother I gotta say the guy she took to Prom looks like a punk…but it’s my job to say that, right?
It’s also my job to say to her on her graduation day, “You actually graduated?” and then punch her in the arm. She knows that I’m proud and everyone in our small family is proud. I’m not speaking for myself alone here but I’m nervous about where she goes next. What does she take up as her next step in life? I still hope that she travels the world, doesn’t marry too young and takes on hobbies that challenge her to be something great and have a huge impact on our world.
I’m the black-sheep of my family…one of only 2-3 of us that left Florida and started a life far-far away. Maybe that path isn’t for her but, if she remains in Florida I do hope she’ll make her life something special just like I’ve done up here in the woods of New Hampshire with new hobbies, new ideas, travel, friendships and adventure. Live on both coasts, live in Europe and do really dumb stuff as well.
Most importantly I hope she stays away from drugs as I have and keep celebration to a minimum. It’s easy in our generations to celebrate just showing up to work on time and expecting praise but the bare minimum isn’t worth posting to Twitter. Celebrate each day but don’t look for people to give a shit that you brushed your teeth and how pretty your makeup is. Vanity is all too common and it will swallow you hole. Live well, live clean, live positively but don’t look for admiration in Facebook comments and don’t look for romance in the night-life of bars and clubs.
The greatest friendships in my life were made while doing things that I loved and don’t seek out companions in crime until you’ve found happiness within. Check yourself and where you stand in life each and every day because if things are falling into chaos, everyone will know before you and hope that the people you love truly love you enough to sit you down and share their feelings with you but ideally, you catch yourself before chaos ensues.
Take time off for yourself. Don’t unwind with constant partying or TV binges or substances. Unwind alone with a good book or alone surrounded by nature. Take solo trips without the people you love and find a hobby that allows you alone time. For me, this was photography and writing. These are lonely but satisfying hobbies and I hope you find your escape.
A long time ago, adulthood started at graduation from high school. Some people delayed that until after 4-12 years at university and now some young people are really taking their time to travel, work crappy jobs and get married at the ripe old age of 30. You can do that, I certainly have but try to progress to a higher-level each day. Think of it like coffee. If you have a cup of coffee, have a glass of water to balance out the dehydrating properties. Try that in daily life as well toward everything. Balance out the BS with the positive stuff.
Finally, I’ve had a few very close friends with older and younger siblings separated by 10 years. Both of my previous girlfriends were 10 years younger than their siblings so I took their thoughts on sibling interactions to heart because I saw a bit of you in their upbringings. I moved away when you were young and we don’t relate like we used to but once you enter the work force, move into your own place, travel a bit, I think we’ll have a lot to talk about. No matter how far away I am, the distance is never a measure of how disconnected we are. I’m always a phone-call away to talk about any problems you’re having and my pull-out couch is always here for you if you want to get-away for a while. Whatever you need, I’m here for you.
Congratulations Cheyenne on graduating from Pedro Menendez High School exactly 10 years to the day that I graduated from the exact same school. You’re going to do great things. I love you.
PS: Marley, keep working hard in high school. You’ll be receiving a diploma before you know it. If Cheyenne and I could do it, so can you.
Here’s Marley(left – age 4) and Cheyenne(right – age 7) driving to my HS graduation on May 22nd, 2004:
And Cheyenne, just to help you not feel like too much of a dummy in your graduation gown, here’s me in 2004 wearing an exact version of the one that you will wear in the coming days. Yes, I look like an idiot and let’s hope you wear your gown a lot better than I did. What a nerd!
