★ “Click! You’re gone.”

His First Visit

I’m a slow reader so it’s a fear of mine that I’m the last Apple fan to complete the biography of Steve Jobs which was delivered to me via Kindle on its release date. Part of me is certain that many of us who didn’t think twice about buying the book didn’t actually read it cover to cover. The juicy bits of the biography have been publicized on blogs and news outlets around the world and the pundits have weighed in with their thoughts on the life of Steve and what’s next for Apple. So many of our industry’s most critical Apple bloggers raised the question of the author, Walter Isaacson and if he was the right person to author such a book. Truthfully, I don’t give a shit. The life of Steve, from the details us fans had already put together to the intricities that were far less publicized nor had ever been disclosed were in this book. His friends, enemies and most critical advisors spoke about moments they spent with Steve and their thoughts on his life and Isaacson put together each of these in near chronological order. The one thing that wasn’t in this book was the story of his last day on Earth but, for most of us, the telling of how he spent his last day at Apple is perhaps more important to us and maybe to Steve.

I’m not here to review this book or to defend Steve for being a “charismatic asshole”. I’ve said everything that is worth saying in this post which I authored on the day Steve stepped down from Apple (August 24th, 2011). I did reread that post to ensure that my words held true months after Steve left Apple and this world. I still think that they do. Every day, I find myself saying out loud to friends or just to myself how it still doesn’t seem a reality that Steve is gone. Today, you can buy Apple products and watch Pixar films that you know he touched. He looked at these things, he touched them and, at times, he called them “shit” until teams refined them into “genius”. In 5 years, that will no longer be the case. The charges on our credit cards at the Apple Store or at the Theatre won’t be for products that were touched by Steve and we can hope that his legacy does live on at least for a little bit but it’s really hard to say for sure.

The companies Steve was a part of are made up of very smart people. They contributed 99% of the work and Steve contributed 1% but that 1% made all of the difference. That flare is gone now and the future is uncertain. That’s my technology voice speaking though. That’s the geek blogger in me who thinks about life in binary and wonders what’s next, not the person who didn’t think too much about technology when reading the book about Jobs.

Throughout the Steve Jobs audiobook, I enjoyed laughing at the moments that lead to technological breakthroughs but I thought hard, occasionally pausing my iPhone at parts that really made me think. I thought about Steve’s garden and trips to India and his time on crazy diets and studying with holy men and the care and attention he put toward picking out furniture and I really thought hard about how I can be more like Steve. The model for life as lived by Steve Jobs is not one that is for everyone, nor is it really for anyone because that was his life so, living off mangoes for 30 days straight is not something I’m about to take up but I feel strongly about trying to live my life differently. It’s something I already do and love. The egotistical side thinks that I should live a life that people find interesting. If my life were a book, would someone read it. I don’t strive for that anymore but I used to. No, it’s not about following in Steve’s footsteps or intentionally throwing myself into interesting situations that make people turn their heads. It’s really about living a life that, if I were to die that day, people would say that I was doing something incredible even on my last day on Earth.

You don’t have to jump out of airplanes to live an incredible life. That’s too exhausting. Don’t live a life that makes you tired all of the time but don’t live a life where you’re well rested either. It’s not up to us to mimic Steve’s time on Earth but we should put down the book after reading the last page and book a trip to India or start a garden or read a book on Buddhism even if our life has been one where we attend a Christian church every Sunday. Steve’s life was more of a child’s life until the age of 7 or 8 where you don’t do things because you’re trying to expand your mind, prove something or get a promotion. You do things because they feel right in your gut and they look like a lot of fun! For a Catholic, reading a book on Judaism doesn’t get you anywhere with friends or family and it might make your religion seem confusing after you’re finished but you didn’t do it to have clarity, you did it to have more questions and to learn something and maybe, read more books later. That book may put you on another path and, over time, the fear becomes an adventure.

One day, we will die. It’s so easy to make scrambled eggs because you’ve been doing it for 30 years or you can try sunny-side up, fail the first 10 times and learn something. From now on, I’m going to spend more of my time doing things that scare the shit out of me because being uneasy is the closest I’ll feel to being alive.

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